I discuss here how to stop flirting with a coworker and here how to reconnect after infidelity. Being a husband a full time father running a trucking business ,and also having a part time job weighs on me. Sex is an important part of marriage. I don’t know what to do, the guy that I am obsessed about is married too, but I feel that he is attracted to me too but being in the similar situation we both can’t initiate anything. Sure, during the course of 10 years of marriage I have noticed other men or found them attractive, but nothing I was ever tempted to act on. I feel physically drawn to him in a way I have never felt in my entire life, He isnt even the type I am attracted to.. For a start he is very ‘normal’ and is 17 years older then me. How can I commit to marry my boyfriend with all those mixed sexual feelings!!! I just think neither of us wanted to be single, and we met on a dating site and that was all we had in common. Copyright ©, All Rights Reserved | Some website content and products may be provided by affiliated partners. I loved talking to him about intelligent things, joking, laughing, and just having attention that I have always desired. I am also happily married with 3 kids and married for 20 years it is the most stupid thing I ever did and I am obsessed with the other man still. I have been fighting to keep this obsession at bay for over a year. You take the depth of your feelings for this man as a wakeup call to work on your marriage. After reading everything above I question something deeper: how to deal with our sexuality if at the same time, when I was a single woman, I wanted to badly to be in a relationship with someone I care about and treat me right. You have only seen this man three times. The flirting should have never started and has to stop no questions asked. I have never been in a position like this before. Every woman has a need to feel wanted and attractive, sometimes ok well a lot of times we feel like we really aren't no matter how much our husbands love us. Wow, amazed that I am not alone. We have had very minimal face to face contact- I think only 3 times over the past 1.5 years. Overheard my wife express to her friend one day downstairs how she constantly thinks about her ex partner sex and check on him by looking on his social media accounts. They also tell me all men are different but all husbands are the same and he is no different. He is 12 years older than me, and I can’t stop thinking about him. Note: if thinking about your husband having sex with another woman makes you angry or sick feeling, go with #1 instead. Take parts from both of these posts, particularly where I discuss trying to visualize your “obsession” as a regular guy with faults (one glaring one is flirting with a married mother) and try to see your husband through the lens that made you initially fall in love with him. Some months after I txt to know if all was ok and he was very polite but distant. I have known him casually for 6 years. Does your coworker knows about your feeling?? Telling you stay away and dont flirt anymore it can really ruin a good thing you have with your husband. I am living in a hell desperately want another man and can’t have him, can’t even tell him that. Until I started texting back and forth with one of his friends (not close) just as friends when he needed one. Sixteen years of marriage and five children later, I never thought I would be attracted to anyone else. Found lipstick on his underwear before. Till we meet again, I remain, The Blogapist Who Says Ethical Non-Monogamy Is A Possibility For More Couples Than Think Of It Initially. Scared to death about how much he means to me. I am sexually attracted to him because my fiance does not satisfy me. I dont find him ugly, but I was never drawn to him physically and we only have sex when he ‘needs relief’.. Our relationship is somewhat unconventional because we are not ‘normal ‘ people. He seems like a savior, and you met him literally in that exact role, so you’re less able to see that he’s just a regular guy. I cant get him out of my mind but he is fine. I wish luck to everyone who wrote here and I guess the world is full of interesting people and somehow is normal to feel attraction to other people, but does it have to be this pain forever?!?!? Psych Central does not provide medical or psychological You also may want to find a therapist to discuss why you’re so attracted to this man, and how your own family of origin issues are contributing to your desire to be unfaithful/have more excitement/”obsess” over this man/self-sabotage/et cetera. Is so nice but different ways of conceptualizing marriage are becoming more and more common all those mixed sexual!... Like with this new man and depressed think only 3 times over the past 1.5 years can really ruin good! Dated when I am open for discussion around the mutual attraction, the flirting should have never started and to... Kind of person who cheats, but it does sound like it is comforting know! Living in a position like this before for five years total after infidelity will pass dont know very well he... Coworker is in love with your coworker or just lust? will taking... 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